Happy days, everyone!

Giants-Patriots. A rematch of 2007. Brady vs Eli. Brady vs his own legacy. Eli vs his older brothers legacy. Belichick vs Coughlin. Pass Rush vs Pass Game. The Spirit of Myra Kraft vs. The forces of Evil. So many underlying themes and juicy  story lines.

But hey, there’s still a football game to be played. No matter what the talking heads in Bristol, Connecticut try to tell you.

Here are things we know about Sundays game:

1: Somebody will win, somebody will lose.

2: There will be about three quality commercials and about fourteen-fifteen absolute flops.

3: Madonna will be a disappointing halftime show.

4: Rob Gronkowski, if he plays, will NOT be 100%.

5: Tom Brady is a better quarterback than Eli Manning

6: Bill Belichick is a better coach than Tom Coughlin

7: The Giants have more talented defensive players than the Patriots

8: The game is being played in Indianapolis – which does NOT favor New England.

9: Lots of people will be watching the game.

10: Whoever scores more points wins.

Other than that, who knows? Everyone wants to talk about the Giants pass rush versus the New England offensive line. The ‘football experts’, as they fondly call themselves, predict that New England will win the game if Tom Brady has time to sit in the pocket, make his reads, and throw the ball. 

No, shit. Really?

If you gave, like, 24 of the quarterbacks in the NFL time to throw- they are going to beat you. If Tom Brady gets to lounge in the pocket all day OF COURSE New England’s offense will be successful! Isn’t it easier to complete passes if you aren’t running for your life with Jason Pierre-Paul in hot pursuit?

They also say things like If the Giants can control the ball, eat clock, and get the ball out of Tom Brady’s hands, they will win the game. Once again, thank you very much for this breaking news. If the Giants win the games within the game – turnovers, time of possession, etc – they will probably be successful. That’s not news. Belichick knows it. Coughlin knows it. That applies to every football game ever played. If the Giants were playing the Alabama Crimson Tide and ‘Bama controlled the ball, ate clock, and didn’t let Manning have any good looks then ‘Bama would win! It’s football.

I’ve gotta make a prediction for this game, well, because everyone else is doing it. I see this game being close, down-to-the-wire, nail biting, intense… basically everything a Super Bowl should be. These two teams are the last standing after a long and violent NFL season. Neither team will give any ground. Both the Giants and the Patriots have had an extra week to prepare for each other. This will result in a low scoring game, because both defenses will be well prepared.

The pick: 24-21 New England

Myra Kraft prevails.

I hope everyone has an awesome Superbowl Sunday!